question.

why do i sign up for things when i know i won't be able to follow through in completing it?

I bought a notebook with the hopes of being able to write my thoughts down. I haven't written in it for weeks.

I join forums, and websites and rarely remember to visit them again.

I start art projects and they sit, hopelessly unfinished and gathering dust.

I say "i'll talk to you later!" When "later" is really months from now.

I say "i'll work on it ms. therapist" when as soon as the words leave my mouth they're forgotten, only to be remembered when i meet them again.

I wish that like computers, we could truly be made-over and released again as a "New and Improved!!" version of our former self, with past problems erased from memory.

However, those memories will only be brought up by skeptics wondering if you're really different.

noirebelle 2.1?

My Hair Smells Like Coconuts

i'm growing out my hair. No Relaxers for a while

21 Days 'til Christmas. I'm hoping it's a good one. the snow is making me happy

I've reflected on what i've done this year and it wasn't much.
Anxiety played a huge part in what i could and couldn't do in 2007.
I really hope that 2008 will be different. I said the same thing in 2006 about '07 and the same about '06 in '05. i feel that because i'm a bit more mature, that i'll actually have my hope come into fruition.

I made a list of "Things I Want to do, Goals I want to Accomplish" I'm aiming to have 100+ things on this list but so far, i'm at 65.

So here are the first 25 things on this list and i'll add more later.

1. Finish School (i want to be a college grad and i need to stick to that)
2. Be Healthy
   
3. Be more positive/optimistic
   
4. Finish learning how to speak Cantonese (i started...)
5. Cook a 5 course dinner (i love to cook but haven't made a "dinner" from start to finish)
6. Learn to swim
7. Knit a sweater (i'll probably have that done by the summer)
8. Go to Niagara Falls w/ mom (just her and i)
9. Stay spiritual
   
10. Get another tattoo (i've mentioned that in a previous post)
11. Learn to play the guitar ( i really really want to do this)
12. Be more giving/philanthropic (i think we all need to be)
13. Go to Vegas
14. Get a dog when financially stable (i want to make sure I have to money to take care of a dog)
15. volunteer (no explanation needed)
16. Go rock-climbing
17. Travel Europe
18. Find career that makes me happy (i know what i want to do but i'm not sure if i'll be happy doing it)
19. Learn another language (which one? idk, Italian, Portuguese, German?)
20. Visit a nudist colony (i've always wanted to :] )
21. Try to stay in touch with old friends
22. Take belly dancing lessons
23. Donate a months salary to charity (why not?)
24. Be kissed in the pouring rain (it's a thought)
25. Meet someone famous
    

when any of these happen i'll be sure to write about it

you'll shoot your eye out

or rather yule shoot your eye out. I love that Fall Out Boy song and I'm probably going to listen to it a lot like i usually do around Christmas.

Fave Holiday Songs:

12 days of christmas-taking back sunday

yule shoot your eye out-fall out boy

winter wonderland-jessica simpson and ozzy osbourne

Mr Grinch- Thurl Ravenscroft.

what's this-fall out boy

It finally snowed. however, the weatherpersons report that the snow on the ground won't be around for the next few days until wednesday. although i was born in the spring, i love the winter a lot

There's one month until Christmas. last year i wasn't so excited about it but hopefully it'll be different this year. the anxiety attacks i get usually puts a hold on where i go, but i'm working on it.

One thing different about this christmas is that the tbs station i usually have has changed to "peachtree tv" so i'm going to miss the 24 hour "A Christmas Story" marathon :( . I'm beyond pissed. I really should go out and buy the dvd. though the fun was being able to watch it on tv 24 hours straight.

christmas doesn't seem like it's going to be so good this year

bah humbug

da plane! da plane, boss

for a year or so i've been planning my next tattoo. i'm glad that i have a high pain threshold, because this one is going to be somewhat big. the first one i got was small but it was a test to see what i could handle.

i've been looking and researching google for pic inspirations. it will include this dragon (or some variation of it:

inkworm.co.uk

when am i going to get it? i'm going to get it when i'm able to cope with my anxiety. i'm currently working on doing that through therapy so hopefully in the future i'll be able to get this tat to mark the strength and determination it took me to get there.

it's only through positive thinking that will get there :)

************************************************

miami ink, la ink and next, london ink. the trailer ran today during the new season of miami ink and it'll be another tat show that i will definitely be tuning in to the show.

their link

http://myspace.com/londonink332

guys

i just finished watching maroon 5’s latest music video. i’ve seen the video A LOT. i really like the song and i’ve been a maroon 5 fan for a long time. however, it wasn’t until this music video that i found myself attracted to adam levine. i don’t know why but the video makes him look absolutely sexy. i’m attracted to guys in bands. if they wear guyliner, ditto. jared leto, pete wentz, frank iero, ryan ross. let’s just say that i’m somewhat attracted to white guys. there isn’t any shame in that for me.



that's it.